She’s Alive!

BREAKING NEWS: Reports of Marjorie Quack’s demise have been greatly exaggerated — mostly by Marjorie herself.

In a shocking twist that absolutely no one should be surprised by, Marjorie has returned, slightly singed, mildly offended, and loudly proclaiming that she “meant to do that.”

According to eyewitnesses, she dramatically burst through a pile of trail maps shouting, “YOU CAN’T GET RID OF ME THAT EASILY!” before demanding snacks and asking who approved the memorial kazoo solo.

She would like the community to know:

• she is alive
• she is well
• she is considering suing the synchronized swimming judges
• and she expects a full apology from anyone who cried, laughed, or bet money on her cause of death

Happy April Fools Day from Marjorie Quack — the chicken, the legend, the menace, the survivor.

In honor of her return, we've commissioned another song celebrating her unexpected return!

 
 

Job Listing: Atlas Quest Mascot (Position Now Open) 🦆

 

Official Announcement of Marjorie Quack’s Passing

For Immediate Release to the Atlas Quest Community

It is with heavy hearts and slightly confused expressions that we announce the passing of our beloved mascot, Marjorie “Marge” Quack. After more than two decades of honking, meddling, and generally disrupting the natural order of things, Marjorie has embarked on her final journey — presumably to a place with unlimited corn and no posted trail rules.

Marjorie’s final moments were as gloriously chaotic as her life. While attempting to demonstrate “proper zipline form” to a group of new letterboxers, she was unexpectedly caught in a freak dust devil, carried across multiple counties, and deposited directly into a synchronized swimming competition. Though she earned a perfect score for artistic impression, she was ultimately disqualified for “being a chicken,” which witnesses say she took very personally.

We ask the community to take a moment of silence — or a moment of loud, indignant honking — in her honor. You may also sign her tributes page and share your own memories of her.

Further details about her memorial service will be shared shortly.